Your seven to eleven years old child's understanding of the world and relationships is far more sophisticated now. You will find that you can explain things to them and reason with them more easily.

It is, however, the age of the SULK! Typical 9 year old behavior would be that whatever you ask them to do, whether to tidy their room, do their homework, lay the table, they will dig their heals in and act as if you are being monstrously unfair to them!

Sulking in the seven to eleven years is usually in response to feelings of lack of control or freedom.

• Try to include your child as much as possible in decisions you make.
  
  
• You cannot, however, always do this, and if you have a sulker, the best policy is to pretend you haven’t noticed they are sulking!
  

Behavior chart.

There are greater means for bribery at this age, such as pocket money, but this is also a good age to introduce a Behavior Chart

• List a few simple rules, or behavior you want to see, and allow a few lapses in the week, with a special reward at the end of the week if they have achieved their target.
  
  
• Make the treat special enough to be worth their while, you can get them to choose from a selection of possibilities, such as a trip to an adventure park, or a meal out etc.
  

The seven to eleven age group had a great deal more freedom when we were children, even more when our parents were children. Today's seven to eleven year olds are cooped up at home for longer than is good for them. They watch endless TV, play endless computer games, and have very few opportunities to explore the world and play creatively.

If you are able to allow your children a degree of freedom, whether in a large garden or a nearby playing field then you, and they, are lucky. Many families do not have the facilities for this. Instead they find themselves ferrying their children around to various clubs and adventure play areas. This is hard on the parents but a necessary evil.


Our children need to:

• have social opportunities with us out of the way
  
  
• learn new skills
  
  
• have a great deal of exercise.
  

If we are able to provide this for them, then we will reap the rewards by having tired but satisfied children.

If all of these options are closed to you, consider going with them to a large open space.

• Allow them to roam free, knowing where you are.
  
  
• Stay within whistling distance, but allow your children to explore their surroundings, build a 'den', invent games, and do all the things that children of their age need to do to develop.
  
  
• If you have only one child, invite a friend to go along too.

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